yourspecialeyes:

fortisfiliae:

captofthesswolfstar:

ao3feed-thorki:

bettsfic:

smarsupial:

dorkilybeautiful:

k-vichan:

mittensmorgul:

prairiedust:

hazeldomain:

prairiedust:

hazeldomain:

whitmerule:

soupernabturel:

majesticduxk:

So last week I tried moaning every time I ate something delicious.

It was vaguely uncomfortable and unnatural

I actually love the idea of doing this trying out fanfic/literary cliche’s out in real life, kinda wanna make up a list and undertake it as a challenge.

don’t forget to make your butthole flutter today

Guess someone’s eye color from 20 feet away.

Be careful with these. I started reading fanfiction three years ago and now I have to toe my shoes off to get my feet out.

But do you pad across rooms? 

Yes but I often give away my position when I huff.

FYI, I’m smirking at all y’all.

I’m resisting the urge to card my fingers through everybody’s hair.

This is as good a time as any to admit that right now I smell like coffee, sandalwood soap, and something uniquely myself.

I hate this post so much I clenched my fists and looked away, muscles bunching in my jaw. 

i’m so glad to see i’m not alone, i let out a breath i didn’t know i was holding

I looked at myself in the mirror, carefully mapping out every detail of my face, especially my eyes. They are cerulean orbs made of pure ocean water that can be seen a 1000 yards away. Is that disturbing? Yes. Yes it is.

My breath just hitched and I felt shame wash over me. I know I’m guilty of all of these. 😂

I felt my cheeks getting hot, deep red spreading across them, while reading these. The guilt is real.

This whole post made me chuckle darkly.

cacklebarnacle:

jumpingjacktrash:

themiscyra1983:

one-for-all-plus-ultra:

xekstrin:

icedsilver:

tilthat:

TIL plants make caffeine to defend themselves against pests. Caffeine is toxic to birds, dogs, cats, and it has a pronounced adverse effect on mollusks, various insects, and spiders.

via reddit.com

Coffee plant: *evolves caffeine* Safe at last

Humans: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Why are we like this….

the fact that we can’t drink sea water even tho its the most common type of water just bc its 3% salt yet we can safely consume multiple forms of literal poison and even benefit from doing so just blows my fucking mind

Peppers: Now that I have capsaicin, no mammal will eat me! ONLY BIRDS. THE BIRDS WILL SPREAD MY SEEDS.

Humans: oh my god this burns so good

Peppers: wut

poppies: at last, i have evolved my sap to the point where anything that eats me will sleep… FOREVER

humans who are about to invent painkillers: hey guess what

tobacco: finally i can grow in peace, no more insects munching on my leaves.

humans holding matches: my, my, what do we have here?

alivannarose:

roachpatrol:

nakedmallrat:

adventures-in-asexuality:

nakedmallrat:

cant believe a bunch of english kids go through a fuckin cupboard and find a magical kingdom full of wonder and they go “yeah we’re the royal family now”

typical english behaviour

I think what’s more creepily imperialistic is the reaction of everyone in Narnia to the Pevensies.

Like, the Pevensies end up the royal family in large part because everyone’s like ‘it has been prophesied that you will come and rule us and everything will be great!’ and, well, in-universe I can’t really fault them on that; if I were a young teen or pre-teen in a completely foreign country, I too would probably just go along with whatever seem to make people friendly to me.

But the reaction of the Narnians, in almost ubiquitously welcoming these foreigners as obviously destined to rule them even though they know nothing of the country and the culture… now that is some creepily imperialist writing.

This is the only good reblog of this post in it’s entire 3 year hellscape existence

if four foreign kids popped out of a magic box and deposed trump by the express wishes of god’s fursona, i’d crown ‘em. this winter already fuckin feels like it’s lasted 100 years. 

Well, fuck, there is that.